That is what we want for children. And a nation of father/mother families produces it.

But this society gropes about in the darkness of denial of that obvious, Biblical truth. Opinion makers stubbornly cling to their political correct agendas. They insist that fathers are not particularly important. Fatherhood is a hangover from the dark ages of the 1950 sit-coms. TV commercials depict dad as a bumbling buffoon. The role of fathers is frivolous

Some even claim fathers are the problem. So, children are better reared by single moms. We are the only society in history to say that we prefer a child not to have a father.

We are moving toward the dogma that the worth of a father begins and ends with propagation. So those who judge themselves "our cultural elite" busily promote the cause of homosexual parenting. Lesbians obtain the products of sperm banks and have children. These children not only are reared in a practicing homosexual environment, but they also grow up without fathers.

And the cultural message degrading the worth of fathers is heard loud and clear by those men already bent toward moral irresponsibility. They readily agree that the worth of fatherhood is restricted to propagation. So they father children without marriage. Those who father children within marriage soon skip. So the irresponsible male and the cultural sophisticate are in agreement--fatherhood is frivolous.

But there is one area of disagreement--the child-support check. The culture demands it. The irresponsible male reasons that if his fatherhood worth ends with propagation, so does his fatherhood liability. The result is the shocking numbers of children in this nation living in poverty.

But even those family "authorities" who profess that fathers have value are confused over just what fathers do. They perceive fathering as taking up the slack of parenting produced by absentee career mothers. The culture perceives child-rearing strictly in feminine terms. No value is affixed to masculine properties in parenting. In fact, fathers are told they must be re-educated. They must renounce their masculinity. The must cultivate feminine traits.

But father is not a bench warmer who gets into the parenting game only when mother needs a substitute. Fathering is not mothering. Dad is not "Mr. Mom."

The role of father is unique. What the father brings to the parent-child relationship cannot be brought by the mother. For what the father brings is maleness.

Such maleness is essential. How will a woman who has never had a father know how to relate successfully with a husband? How will a man learn how to be father without a father?

A fugitive father, one who has taken flight from his family responsibilities, cannot teach such essential life lessons and relationships.

A basic trouble of this society is that we deny creation. "God made them male and female." And children must have this creation-mandated male/female difference.

For there is mother's love and daddy's love. Mother's love is exemplified by tenderness, acceptance, comfort, sympathy, closeness, warmth, understanding. Daddy's love is strong, protective, challenging, confrontive, authoritative, encouraging, guiding.

Of course, these loves are not absolute. They overlap. But they are typified by these different characteristics. Children need both.

To feminize fatherhood is to deny children an essential need: masculine love. Motherhood and fatherhood are not interchangeable parts. Children feel and mean something quite different when they say "dad" than when they say "mom."

A child does not need gender neutral parenting. A child needs a father who is a man.

Of course, many men sorely need re-educating. They need to learn what a man is and what a father does.

Many men perceive their manhood in licentious, materialistic, even violent terms. "I am a man because I have sex with lots of women." "I am a man because my girl friends have my babies." "I am a man because I have money and possessions." "I am a man because if you don't respect me, I will hurt you."

The church needs to lead men to perceive their manhood in Biblical terms: "I am a man because I support, protect and love my family." Being a man means being a good father.

Specifically, the church needs to teach men:

1. When you father a child, you do so in the context of marriage.

The unwed birth epidemic is cracking the foundations of the nation. Fathers must return to God's order: marriage first, babies later.

2. When you father a child, you--not the mother or the government--assume the financial responsibility for that child. The basic role of father is that of provider. The scripture is pointed: a father who does not provide for his own family denies "the faith and is worse than an infidel."

3. When you father a child, you become the moral teacher and the spiritual leader of that child. It is to fathers that Paul said: "Bring your children up in the training and admonition of the Lord."

Finally, the church needs to reveal a truth to men that is a big secret in this society: being a married father is the key to being a fulfilled, happy man.

Never before has it been so tough for children to cope in this culture. Alcohol, drugs, violence, sexual temptation--the problems are myriad. And they are everywhere.

And society is no help. Education has been secularized. Culture has been de-religionized. The language of the Bible is an unknown tongue.

So if children are taught virtues, the home must be the school. If children are sensitized to the reality of the spiritual, they must come to know the God who is the father of our Lord Jesus Christ. For that to happen, their fathers must be teachers of the truth and shepherds of their souls.

I spent the first six years of my life in Americus, GA. Every time I travel there; I hear a voice deep in the recesses of my memory. It is the voice of a man praying. It is the voice of my dad. Hearing my dad pray and experiencing his moral and spiritual shepherding had an enormous impact on my life. It is a treasure I shall always prize.

Every child needs a praying dad, a good dad, a loving dad, a godly dad--and yes, a present dad. Indeed, the most urgent need of America is Biblical fathers: strong, loving, boundary setting, character building, goal challenging, Bible teaching, church going, Christ serving, God praying dads.